RIGHT IN THE JUGULAR!!

Admist raised eyebrows, equivocal gasps and at the risk of being of being branded mentally dischordant I must admit that I am a Jug Suraiya fan. The secret is out in the open now, it's something we don't speak about in the family and fiend complete ignorance about. Whenever the topic of conversation veers to this 'condition' of mine there are awkward silences followed by a nod-the-head-pat-the-back gestures of condolence. Even Shantabai was taken aback on hearing my heinous affliction and ever so resourceful suggested that it must be a bhoot-pret cha lafda.
I caught the Jug-bug about three years ago and since then have been diagnosed with extremetly high levels of sarcasm and bouts of morose idiocy. I know many such Jugaddicts, but they have been too scared to come out for the fear of being bullied by small children. I think all they need a platform, like Mannalow has his fannalows, apna Jug can have Juggalows...er...maybe not.
He is indeed one of the most prolific, relatable and endearing writers that I have come accross. His sardonic gesticulations and insightful alarcity for current events is a delight. An amalgam of a wide spectrum of mental callisthenics which provide with just the right doses of unadulterated entertainment. A serious cause juxataposed with earthy, radical humour has been a mainstay of his column Jugular vein. A paradox just like the ongoings of our daily lives.
He is also a knowlegeable traveller (from what I gather) and has written many interesting, quirky books (see link). His foremost contribution to pop-culture post 9/11 and the war on Iraq has been Dubyaman. Our very own POTUS out to screw the world which is a no-holds-bar take on the man and his incocious but hilarious bushisms.
I can imagine a band of world weary Suraiya groupies, waiting wryly in front of the TOI building, in the scorching sun. Till the man arrives with his characteristic swagger and the crowd of atleast ten goes into a mass frenzy, jiggling paunches and svelte midriffs, vying for that Jug autograph. I envision a world that wakes up to Dubyaman, which is quite a scary prospect in reality. Mind you his articles may trigger hysterical bouts of infectious humour. We all love JUGS, don't we? Yeah, Jugs for president! Amen to that!